Vegetable of the Day

Bitchy Being a bartender or a server really can be an exercise in keeping one’s sanity. I am not quite sure what happens to people when they go out to a restaurant. Sometimes I feel as though I have entered a parallel universe. This is of great concern to me.  If this is how people are operating in their day-to-day lives,  “Houston, we have a problem!” Now, we have already discussed handling people when they cannot handle themselves. (If you need a little refresher, here you go, This Is Going To Hurt Me Way More Than You) What we have not discussed is the communication breakdowns that occur between Server and Servee.

Observe:

Me: “Have you decided on your dinner?”

You: “Yes.  I am going to have the Steak Tips.”

Me: “Great choice! Do you want them rare, medium rare…..?”

You: “Um, I don’t want any pink, but I don’t want overdone. Soooooo, medium-well?”

(Uh-oh, this is already showing signs of trouble ahead.)

Oh-no!

Oh-no!

Me:  “Medium-well it is.  Two sides come with your entrée.  Would you like smashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, french fries or rice pilaf?”

You: “Baked.”

(Um, that was not an option.)

Me: “We don’t have baked.”

You: “No baked?”

(Actually, you caught me. I hide them around the place like an Easter egg hunt!)

See any baked potatoes around here?

See any baked potatoes around here?

Me: “No.”

You: (big sigh) “I guess I will do smashed.”

Me: “Now, for your second side – quinoa, red and golden beets, coleslaw, baked beans, or tonight’s vegetable which is asparagus?”

You: “I’ll have broccoli.”

(What? Where did you get broccoli out of asparagus.)

Me: “Tonight we have asparagus, not broccoli.”

You: “How about spinach?”

(Am I having a stroke? Am I slurring my words?)

Me: “No spinach this evening. Tonight we have asparagus.”

You: “Are you sure?”

Not broccoli, not spinach

Not broccoli, not spinach

(Oops! You caught me again.  I have them hidden with the baked potatoes.)

Xoxo, Amy

2 thoughts on “Vegetable of the Day

  1. Something got mixed up in my message – the ending As for the vegetables, some restaurants seem to add all the leftover vegetables together and call them something gourmet. Guests know what’s going on, don’t try to fool us. No more leftovers disguised as a house speciality.

  2. Ok. Having been in that very situation, I’ll tell you from the guest’s side what is going on. You want to go out to dinner and sometimes have a special meal in mind. When I order a steak I want a baked potato as do most people. So I would suggest to speak with you chef and when serving steak, please also have baked potatoes. You will have happier and returning customers. Very disappointing to have something in mind and not get it. As for teh vegetables, some restaurants seem to add all the leftover vegetables together ad call tainwrunw fiyenwr aiybsubf vyr rgw fywar jbiqa rgr rgwt;ew siubf, /xB;R DWWK YA,

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